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Mighty Mouse

Aaron Holtz: Veteran Of the MI

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Photo of Aaron Holtz before a drop during one of the many operations of the 112th
Lawful Neutral
Renegade<███████ | ███████>Paragon

Sanity/Moral
Broken Mind <███████|██████|██████> Clear Minded


General Information

Name: Aaron Holtz
Aliases: Doltz, Eagle Eyes
Faction: Mobile Infantry
Age: 25
Place of Birth: Terra.
Status: Alive
Known Languages: English, French (Major)
Mental Illnesses: PTSD, Depression.
Physical Disabilities: Missing right pinkie|| Missing Left Leg || Synthetic Jaw||
Occupation: Soldier, Warrant Officer
Motto: "I'm getting too old for this."
Weight: 185 Lbs
Height: 5.7
Hair Color: Light Brown
Eye Color: One Blue, One Green

COMMENDATIONS:
General Specialization x 4
Purple Heart x [Lost Count]
Campaign Ribbon - 0.0
Campaign Ribbon - Hesperus
Federal Defense Medal
Mobile Infantry Distinguished Service Medal x4


Demeanor: Calm, To himself, Grumpy.
Habits: Watching the stars, Mumbling to himself.
Phobias: Atychiphobia (The fear of messing up), Thanatophobia (Fear of losing loved ones)
Marital Status: Widowed
Mental State: Sane
WEAPON(S): DMR, MK2, MK3, MK4
OUTFIT: Basic MI Gear, Scratched up helmet and Armor
SPECIALIZATIONS: Weaponry. 
JOB: Mobile Infantry
FAVORITE ITEM(S): A Ring, Jack's Dog tags.



RELATIONSHIPS: Family of the MI
(To be built later: Make it easier for me, Request!)
Lover/Romantic feelings/ Trusted/Amiable / Respected / Acquaintance / Known / Neutral / Mixed / Particular/Exceptional Dislike /  = Sanity / † = Deceased



G.Maclagan: "A true battle brother. He and I have been through a lot together. If you asked me how we got so close so quickly I wish I could tell you. I don't know. We bonded in a week, trading stories, laughing, drinking. Making fun of each other in a way I could feel happy. - Now, I can say he's one of the closer people to my heart. I care deeply for this man. Though he has seen me at my worst, and never my best. Us running the Specialist program I hope sheds light on my true colors. No matter the wars we have fought together, or how long the journey for both of us has been. I'm glad we still have each other."
 

F.Sorrentino"Franco! Haha! Holy fucking shit I haven't been this happy in months. It's glad to have a fellow member of the Reapers back on the ship. 99th. Hah.. Erugh. I don't know who I've become I think this is my wake up call huh? I never used to be so mad, I never used to be so snappy, and I was always calm. - With Franco's aid and help, I will become who I truly am. In time. I digress, this man and I go way.. waay ..waaaaaayyy back, He used to be our Staff Sergeant while I was the lonley medic of the Platoon. It..it wasn't an easy job, but having him back I feel calm.."

 
V.Faust: "This young trooper is one I can trust with my life. And that's saying a lot seeing how I've made it through god knows how many battles, wounds, and all the kind. - But why do I say such a thing to someone I don't know that well? It's because she has always followed my orders, covering fire with her Mark two, as well as giving worry toward the troopers around her. I think one day she'll make a great trooper to aid me in leading others. But I won't push her into that. As long as she keeps up the good work. I only see good things coming her way. -- I've seen her grow now, she has become what I hoped and even more so, this makes me rather proud and happy that she is still alive after all this time. She's become on of the best Machine Gunners around, besides myself. I'm kidding, but she has grown to become someone smart, powerful, she has much to learn still and I will keep her under my wing till I bite the bullet."
 
A.Thacker: "This one. Hm. Mrs. Thacker. She is one that I think I feel rather.. protective of. Due to the fact I have seen what the horrors of war can do to someone like her. She reminds me a lot of what I used to be like before I lost my friends, Scared, Jumpy. But then again she was a POW just like me. I think that's why I relate to her. I just wanna make sure she doesn't snap like I did. She is a kind soul, though her time adjusting to the ship is...taking longer than I would have thought, then again I never knew what happened to her with the ThanSol. Lord only knows what could have happened. Though I do plan to get her to open up more, to...trust in others once again. Perhaps taking her under my wing is something I should do. I digress. She's kind, yet scared, sweet, but to herself. Again. Much like how I used to be. She'll open up soon enough to where we can all see that darling smile once again. I hope.."
 
J.Knoxx: "Knoxx is a trooper who can take my humor. Then again. I don't really have much of one. She's fun to talk to when I get the chance. But all in all. I don't have much to say about this one, I wish I did, I just haven't really gotten to know her as much as I hoped. Though. It's not to say I don't see her around the ship time to time. She seems to be doing well thus far. Im shocked she's still alive, I mean shit I thought she would have died ages ago but nope here she is, looking to get an NCO again."
 
 
Spoiler

TRANSFERS / RETIRED

R.Shaw: "Shaw, Holy shit what can I say about him! He's like a brother. He took me under his wing when I was.. what a private? Honest to god, He's the best damn leader I've ever met. I'm more than proud to die for him, to be by his side. If there was anyone I was willing to die for more than anyone? It'd be Shaw. Too bad he and Beuno didn't work out, I rather enjoyed the pair. He says he found someone else.. maybe? Hell I'm not sure he might be lying. None the less, Shaw. He's one of my best friends, it's always a joy to have talks with him. Hm..I haven't done that in a while.. I should go talk to him.."

 

F. Esposito: "Don't EVER Fucking EVER hold me down when I am being beaten. Other than the fact of that, Frank. I still think of you as one of my closest friends. Sure at the start I hated your guts, and even a little down the line I hated you some more. *cough* holdingmedown *cough* Ooh, got something caught in my throat. Ah well. Frank, you're a dear friend. But still an asshole. But one of the ones I trust, make sure not to fuck up. Okay?" -- Hey bud, seems you can't hold me down anymore, haha, beating the shit out of me. Fun times, kill yourself for that though. I miss you man, I miss our talks, I miss our little competitions. Stay safe.."

A. Takugawa: "A good man, better medic. He's a old one and has seen the worst of my actions. I am unsure why he hasn't forced a medical eval. I mean I haven't been in the best state of mind of where I have been. Though I have been improving. - I wonder if he sees that. -- He's still a good friend, I wish we talked more. He is far too busy.."


V.Pacheco: "She means a lot to me now. More than I once thought. She's been there for me ... a lot to say the least. She treats me with respect, love, care too. I truly look to her as a mother, one that is indeed. Everyone needs a shoulder to cry on once in a while. Though, I don't think she knows how much she means to me now. She thinks I'll get my rank back soon. I an only hope. I rather enjoyed serving under her command."


D.Hawkins: "Hawkins! I love Hawkins, holy shit dude. Hawkins is someone you can always trust on the field and back on the ship, Hell it's always fun to talk to her. She has given me great advise on how to be a leader, how to forget the things I have done. To shape me into a better person over all. I almost went to the Major General and asked to be moved to Intel, just to work with Hawkins. Now she's with the MI. I couldn't be happier. I wonder if her and Shaw are really a thing. I hope so, they'd be cute."

J.Duvall: "I love this guy, what a great kid! He doesn't say much. Never yells. Hah, That's the joke, he's a mute. No I think he's gonna go far. Though I'm not sure how he's gonna talk.. I've always wondered what would happen if we put him in a leadership roll.. honestly though. To tell a bit of this kid, He's smart, he knows what to do even when I don't have to order around. He's one of my cloesest friends, In the field I know he will have my back, Mute, is one of a kind. One day.. we'll get those seps who ripped your cords out. But for now, Mr.Roboto will be your friend. Hang in there Dunvall... we're here for you. MUTE I STILL LOVE YOU TO DEATH. "

N.Dimov: "There are alot of things I could say about Nikolai. Some good, some bad. I love him, I really do, He's kinda like the father I never wanted. Yet I still have him. He knows how to lead, and does a damn well good job of making sure I'm safe. I'm honored to serve with him. Great friend. I worry about his anger though. -- On the note of anger, Man do I feel a l ot late towards him. You know, Beating me was so much fun. Serioulsy, That pissed me the fuck off. Next time he tries that shit I'll fight back. -- Welp, Couldn't stay mad. He's too dear to me. Damn it. -- Asshole, leaving me as well. Rest easy old man."

 

V.Delatorre: "I gotta say, Del here has become a close friend of mine. Even if I don't agree with some of the things he tells me. He's a damn fine leader. I'd say one of the best we have abaord. I've taken his words to heart which I like to think has made me a better leader myself. -- See Del. YOu can always trust him. He's always there for you and that's something you hardly see now days, sure, he's a bit rough around the edges. But that doesn't make him anyless of a friend. Though, times, I have wanted to fight him, other times I have wanted to hug him. There are so many things I could keep rambling on over and over again. I mean seriously. This guy has told me so many great things, how to trust others. Where to lead, when to back off. His leadership if you can't tell is what sticks out to me. And even if he won't admit it. His kind heart is still there too. He's grumpy time to time. But he still cares. At least I think so"

 

O.Dresdner: "God what an ass, no, no I'm kidding. Honestly, I love the guy. I can always count on him to go above and beyond to help me out. If I have a question, he always has an answer. You know, I thought he died a while back. He is unclear of how, and when he truly got back. Damn "Pathfinder" If you could call them that. Eh, What can you do?"

M.Williams "Spooks! He's quiet the character. My god, he's scary too. Nice! But scary. I respect him, What he does keeps us safe. Though I don't think I can really play him in cards. None the less, I don't know him as well as I wish to. I hope that changes. I enjoy him. -- Did you die? I miss you spooks."

 

K. Geier: "We've been through a lot, hell I've helped her cheer up, get over a few people and .. I like to think push her towards her current lover. - But something has off put me for the few days, did she really press those charges? If so she hardly knows the first thing about me! I'll have to talk to her, and more or less I'm gonna be mad at her for a great deal of time until this is settled. - Doesn't change how good a of a friend she is. Great medic. Always can count on her... For now."

R.Harbringer:
"I fear the day someone pisses this man off enough that he snaps. He's a damn good friend . He was in my squad a few times when I was a leader, me and him worked like gears. Always spinning and moving. He's one of the people I want in my squad at all times. He's loyal. He has faith in me as well. Which now days is all I need to keep me going. Sadly we don't talk as much, he's far too busy dealing with out weapons. I hope he comes out soon. I kinda miss him."

 

A.Dominica: "I never really got to know you back when I first was on the ship. Glad to see you've made Sergeant. But I won't lie. Uh, The way she talks is rather uhm. Hm. Odd. And I find it some times to be annoying but that may just be me? Maybe they like it more than I do and I guess I'll just have to come to terms with that. She seems to be a good leader, I guess. I haven't seen her in charge of a drop but then again who am I to judge. I was shitty as fuck before I left. - But in all honesty? She's someone you can rely on. Always asking if someone needs help in her own..odd way.."


E.Dallas: "What a sweetheart, I mean sure our jokes are rude and vulgar. The best kinds of jokes. For some ODD REASON. I CARE ABOUT THIS WOMAN. -- Why? Maybe because she doesn't take shit, Or perhaps I respect her keen sense of humor, I don't know. Somethin' about her makes me seem to trust her. We should talk more, hell I'll ask her for a drink. I think I'll do that.. maybe. Is that a wise thing to do? I don't drink anymore, And I have a sinking feeling that she is gonna out drink me. No, No I'm SURE she could out drink me. None the less, I want to get to know this woman more, hell, we can swap POW stories."


J. Immelmann: "Boy oh boy did I used to hate you. I mean, Seriously. Hard core I wanted to kill you hate. But.. you've seen to caught me off guard. I like you, your leadership is sound. But you're nor I am ready for such a roll. One day we shall earn our ranks back. I don't regret breaking your nose. -- Where the fuck did you go?"

Kastner: "Honestly, Kastner is a good young kid. But, I don't know them too well, tried to hit on a few times before. I'm honestly unsure of her marraige, She kissed Winters once. That was fun to learn about, gave Winters shit about that for a few days. But, back on track, Kastner seems chill, not sure where her loyalty stands."

G.Murphy: "A kind woman. Very sweet. She seems to be growing closer to me. For that I thank her, I could always use more friends.. More than ever. I hear.. she is with Clair. I was a damn fool to have a crush on her.. Ah.. I hope they work out.. seem to be a cute pair. "

M.Alais: "She took a beating, I gave it to her none the less. I've stopped.. being so cold towards her. I hope she and Holly work out. God Knows what I'll do if Alais breaks this young girl like she broke me. I pray to god, they live their days out with each other. I still wish to have my friend Alais back.. but that will take time"

H.Thomas: "Ah.. yes. The lover of Alais. Honestly I'd be lying if I said.. once I learned.. of the two becoming a thing. Rather annoyed, hurt, and anger. Yet that is in the past. She makes Alais happy, and Alais makes her happy as well. She is a nervous trooper around those she doesn't know. Yet a good person. She seems to have warmed up to me, and I her. We've had our talks of the past, and what we wish to do further a long the road. Ah.. I hope she and Alais work out. As long as someone on this ship can have a successful relationship. Perhaps, there is still hope for others."

Gnome: "Fucking funny guy, I love him to death. Yet theres a lot I don't know about him. In fact I know very little. I do know a few things, he won a car. He crashed his car, and he is rich because of a drag race, But seriously. This man I do trust, I trust him a lot. With my life? Maaaaybbbe no that far.We're getting there slowly.

C.Moreau: "I haven't gotten to know the ...uh.. Spunky? Moreau too well, we've talked a lot when we were low ranks. I kinda miss our late night talks, I liked the porn talk, that was fun. Though currently. I am really worried about her mental state, I hope she is ok.. I need the medics to be ok. They do so much around the fucking ship, God, I'm glad I'm no longer a medic."

A.Stafford: "I can't wait to get to know this young kid more. From what I've seen he does good shit.. a good man. He saved Holly, I heard that story. He is always kind towards me. I do enjoy talking to him time to time. Even if.. it's hard to understand him.. I hope we become friends soon. EDIT: Where are you?"

 

G.Logan: "I know very little about he man himself, but I do know about his valor in the field. Or would it be stupidty? Depends who looks at the man. He doesn't feel pain. Or emotions for that matter, if he does I cannot tell. - Now that's a disorder I can get behind. Would make war a lot easier."

O.Stellveter: "I know little to nothing about him." 

Salem: "Ah..yes the Captain Salem. He is a fellow I rather enjoy talking to. I mean that. Though he is rather unsettling. He seems to hide a lot about himself. Hell he even says his shocked I'm still in the MI. Not sure what he mean by that. Though, I do hope to get to know the man more. He strikes me as a man of many stories, and one of a dark past as well."


Tidbit: "Alright so they're little less of a child."

E.Cartell: "Another Intel officer. God damn how many did we need on this ship? Young kid though. Very, Very young. She seems shy, I wanna get to know her but whenever I try. Something always happens. Either a fight, or, a drop. I still wish to know her.. she seems nice"

K.Harrell: "So uh, Harrell. You're an odd one who has slightly pissed me off. You not only attempted to harm James, but you did so while saying you loved her. - If I recall correctly and if the dates line up. You had a boyfriend. I can only assume the worst of what this could have been. Trying to steal James away from me for your own self gain. What the hell has gotten into you?


J.Martin: ''She's gone. You know I thought I'd be happy about that.. I was.. wrong. She made Dimov happy, I hope their marriage works out."

 


†GRAVE YARD†
 Caine: "What do you mean Caine is dead? What!? No, fuck you. Caine died? Holy fuck... no.. god no, please.. I've know Caine when he was a bloody fucking boot. I trusted him with my life, I saw him leading by my side but, holy shit he's dead? I've lost another friend.. another.. brother in arms. Caine, if you see this. I miss you..I hope it's nice up there."

†Griggs:"Holy Shit. Griggs you dumb sack of shit! You weren't suppose to die, Not fucking yet! God damn it, God damn it I didn't even get to say I'm sorry, I didn't even get to have that one last drink with you. Griggs I'm sorry. I'm sorry how I treated you towards the end. I'm sorry couldn't of helped. Griggs I'm .. I'm sorry."

†Warren: "No..no..nono! NO! Warren god damnit.. Please not you oh god my brother. My little brother of the MI is gone. Oh my god, I can't. I can't keep doing this. I can't keep losing those I love. What am I fighting for. What am I even doing here? I miss my family. I miss Warren, I miss Caine, I miss Banks. I miss Ryuu, Why do they all keep dying. I just want.. I don't know anymore. Warren I miss you so much."

†D.Raske: "Wow.. I didn't.. see this one coming. Didn't he just come back? Christ what bad luck.. Dag, you're one of the best medics I knew.. It's a shame to see you gone. You.. were so young.. Nineteen..fucking hell.. that's too young.. you barely even started to live your true life..Rest in peace Dag.."

†M.Ilari: "I..I lost you too? Ilari! You fucking asshole! You were one of my best friends, fucker. You were gonna bake us some food when we got back, hell you were gonna go far! I bet you'd ..You'd of been a great ..Father, you were my brother. Ilari, we had some crossings that caused us pain, but, I didn't want you to die. Say Hi to Caine..Warren, Ryuu too..won't you?"


†S.Roloshalt: ""Only a mere child. It's a shame what happened to you. I wish yu got to know me, I wish I got to know you. You're the first person to die.. who I never got to call my friend. For that, I am sorry. Please forgive me. "

†Herzog: "Honestly not sure when you left us, How did I not notice the seer amount of annoyance leaving the ship. I kid, he was a good man. I wish I could have called him my friend, but, things didn't work out that way. Now did it."

†J.Entragain: "You.. Your death. Hit me the hardest. God Jack, I loved you so much. You were my brother you are! You ARE my brother. You told me that.. I was.. a kind man, a trooper you could trust. I had no idea, I had no idea when those words came out of your mouth, How much they'd mean to me. Jack.. I carry your dog tags where ever I go. It makes me feel like you're still by my side. I don'tthink you knew how loved you were. Which breaks my heart. So many people loved you, We all loved you Jack. . . I promised to keep Vond safe, I promise to keep the MI safe, I promise I'll bring them home.. I.. I won't let you down.. I love you Jack. "

†Sonja "Artemis" Alexandria: "Zero fucks. Huh.. You know, I met this Marauder not too long ago, She and I became friends rather quickly That is. When I finally got around to drinking with her. We had long talks about the paths we should take. She made me happy, she seemed to care about me. Hell she called me Aaron. No one calls m Aaron. Sure I asked her too only because I called her Sonja. Yet.. I had feelings for her. It would seem I hav- I had.. fallen for this Marauder. Before the drop, she gave me her tape player. I thought shed ask for it back! But. She never made it back that drop. She truly gave Zero Fucks. But that doesn't mean I don't miss her. I miss my friend. I miss the marauder who talked to me, who I felt.. romantically about. I didn't even get to tell you...Christ.. I need a drink."

†A.Dunbaal: "Everyone is dying. Why is everyone leaving why!? I can't. I can't keep losing people so close to me. i can't keep losng the ones I love. GOD. I ..I don't know, I can't think straight I can't even start to even ponder on what has happened. Dunbaal is gone. He's gone he's dead! He's dead.. he's.. gone.. I-I. What more.. does this war have to take from me, what more does this damn WAR WANT FROM ME. I'm tired of losing, I'm just wanting to gain some good. Dunbaal. Why. Of all the people why Dunbaal. -- Christ how's his wife going to take the news. If she's alive. Oh god.. I .. I need.. Time a lone. I need to think I can't.. I won't. I won't let his death go in fucking vain."

†H.Nasser: "You were so young... God so very young.. Yet you were my friend. Someone who had found their way into my heart. I respected you, I cared for you, I tried to make you laugh and smile the best I could. Hearing of what happened to you, of how I wasn't there. Maybe I could have saved you, or traded your place. I don't know, but what I do know is that I will miss you till the end of my days. You kept me happy, our long talks..our longer drinking sessions. You never failed to keep me giggling. -- So now I ask myself, why do such good people die, and if it's the good people that die what does that make me? I know I am no saint. . . . Sometimes, I wish I died with my friends. Heh.. What little I have left.. keep seeming to slip through my fingers... I'll have to make sure the ones I have left.. know they are loved by me. I'm sorry that I was too late to tell you how much you mean to me. Nasser, you were a dear friend. Till we meet again."

†Gastubashi: "HOW IS EVERYONE DYING WHAT THE FUCK MAN. Christ allmighty. Never got that drink.. or tools.. or get to shoot that nuke you promised.. maybe I will when I finally bite a bullet?"

 Poppy Holtz: "I..My god. I don't even understand why, who, how, what. How am I suppose to react, how am I suppose to function? I lost the woman I loved most, my wife, my daring wife, strong...caring. Doesn't help..we were going to have a family. - That's.. uh, N...I don't know what to say. I don't even know if I was a good husband, was I? I hope. I think. I know she loved me, I love her, ...I will always love her. Eurhg... Vond has helped me out, when I was in the 88th... took my mind off it for a while. I feel little to nothing now days, everyone I cared bout is gone. The infantry is the damned MOS. If anyone is reading this.. or if I'm writing this for my own sake of mind if I am doing this to keep my head on straight or if I can't stop thinking about her. Don't fall in love with someone, never. Fuck no. Do your job ,do your time, get the hell out of this place.. don't do what I've done. -- Not. Not a single day goes by that I don't miss my wife, everything feels so cold, dark, I feel so much anger. I push myself away from new people. I think I'll be okay with Vond and Shaw.. they haven't left my side. I'll be okay... I hope."


†C. Rhodes: "Wow, Even you had to die? Christ the bugs..or whatever the fuck got you.. erugh. Rhodes you and I had a hard road. I once called you a lover, then ...well we all know the story. Rhodes was a great friend, better medic, sure we had our fall outs but..still she wouldn't have let me died... I owe her the respect of anyone in the armed forces. Till we meet again."


S.Cronk: "..My dear friend. Cronk. He and I went through a lot. Many battles, and yet here I am typing away on this log. Cronk died in a way I know was painless. But then again I wish I could have been there to help further. In the end. The few that was part of the core have left. I miss him, I miss Cronk a lot. He was an amazing person, he put up with my jokes. Anyone who can do that has to have been someone who was...well crazy. But he was like the little brother I never wanted but had..I hope you rest easy my friend."

 

A.Moria: "A shame this one was nice, I had a fling with her a long time ago. Then again, she moved on to her own ways. I hope she found peace."

 

H. Simonovich: "A old friend, that's what you were. We had some flings we had some horrible times and yet you know what? I'm going to only remember those. In the end of times as you left the 112th. That's who I will remember. The man who saved my life time and time again, when we had drinks, got drunk, Laughed our days away with making fun of the new Privates. And now here we are, I'm typing away once more. Now you're with the stars I gaze at so much. Take care of Rhodes. I'll talk to you soon."


†T.Winters: "I was never informed of my best friends death. I guess time flys when you're a busy man. Though he may be gone... he and I went through the rough times, and yet we made it out alive. I can only assume this man died in the way he'd always tell me. Protecting those he loved. This death has hit me pretty hard, I won't show it too hard, but this is a matter I must live with. If he can watch over me in some kind of life, or in heaven. Shit maybe that bastard went to hell. Where ever that man is. I hope he's having one hell of a time."

F. Krautstag: "Once you leave a unit, and see all your friends on a wall with their names written down. It makes you think, hey that could have been me. I was so shocked to see that Kraut had bitten the bullet. I wish I could say more about this man other than he was one of my dear friends, he had problems at times but we always worked through it at the end of the day, we held onto each other in the darkest of times while we lost those we loved. And I'm here still. Still alive and kicking thanks to this man. Kraut. I hope you can rest easy knowing you did everything you could in life. May you have peace."

 

W.Matene"I didn't know this man on a personal level, I respected and somewhat feared him. He was grand in battle but then again the man carried a spear. Lord knows how he died."

 

J.Bryant: "Seeing this mans name on the block is...depressing. Before I left I took him under my wing, I tried to teach him all that I could but I found out maybe I was just a little too late on this. There is only so much one man can do but, I don't know what more I can say. The good are always taken for a reason. I just hope it was an easy death.."

 

M.Kowlaski: "Another good NCO, taken away. I wish I got to know her more when I was on the ship with her, I don't know how she died. Perhaps it's for the best I don't know. In life she was a great trooper, a better leader. Made me look like a shameful fucking private when she lead the unit one of the best Engineers I ever met. So many lives have been lost in this damn war, one can only wonder how much longer this can go for, how many more lives are to be taken until we win this. Or hell. Lose it."


Journal Logs


8/15/2297:  So, I've returned from the 88th. And. I guess it's been a few weeks from me coming back. I cant say it's truly the same thing I left. It's.. Never going to be the same and that I understand. I get it. It's not going to be easy to adjust to the new leaders, the new soldiers who have taken up the call of the Federation. But I guess I just need to reflect on my life. I know now that before the 88th I was a horrible leader. A worse Soldier who had nothing more than emotional issues who needed something to bring him back down to earth. Which was my wife. Who I lost. But here I am not as a broken man but one as who is to keep a promise he once kept. Bring them home. My best friend Jack Entragain on the day of his death. Screamed out to me as we were to lift off that I brought them home. I know he meant the squad, I know he meant the mission. Yet I've taken this to heart. I've made this my goal. I will bring ever soldier who comes with me back home. No matter the cost, no matter the wounds I may face as long as they make it back I think I can accept my own death when the time comes. I've been here too long. Seen so many faces leave. Yet so many new have also arrived. I'm slowly starting to make new friends around the ship. Kinda. More like I like messing with them and that's about it. Is it really that hard for me to open up to another person? I mean. I have Mac. But, I've slowly turned into a grumpy man like him. Can't say I didn't see this coming. I honestly think a lot of people never expected to see me back. Though I'm glad I did. Shaw is still kicking. It..it was amazing to see him again. I truly meant it when I said he is like an older brother to me. Though he is busy, every time we talk it's a nice time. He has yet to open up to me in full turn, but I still get bits and pieces from him. Right I went off track. Back to my own little thoughts of the unit. It's... uh. Something. It's something else. A lot of new privates need to learn their place, leaders need to take their calling and understand why we do things. But we have been soft. At least from what I've seen. Back when I was a Lance, and Corporal. ...Again. For. Like.. Six times? Christ I was a horrible person. Right, again, we were able to beat troopers and let me tell you it worked on me. I shaped up nice and quick. Am I thinking too much? Am I trying to relive the olden days of the 112th? Maybe. Maybe I should talk to one of the Medics, not..the Young ones I mean. Specialists, I love them. I do. I always have loved the medical core. They do gods work but I cannot just really see anyone. Perhaps there is a medical personal I have yet to me? Eh. Who knows. Unless they find this it'll be to my own accord. To have this small log close. I think I'll say I need to get to know the new ones around the ship. Gain a bond. Remake my Mobile Infantry Family...

 

8/18/2297: I think today's log is just my random thoughts. What do I really want to say? Why the fuck do I care for such new privates or troopers I know little about? Am I trying to prove something to myself due to the lose of all my own old war buddies? Perhaps. But then again, why bother trying to save those who won't accept their own fate? I have so many questions. I have so many things I need to know but I can't seem to get my head wrapped around a few ideas. Which..is worrisome for me. Even a few of the newer troopers have told me I need to talk to one of the medical troopers. But. I think they're wrong. I just think a lot. I like to think about my past, how much I've changed as a person. But. I've taken so many under my wing. Bryant, Ren, Faust, Thacker, a few others too. Why am I doing this? Why the hell am I trying to push these troopers to  be the best they can be? I want them to go farther than I could have, learn from what I messed up on..I don't know. Maybe I should talk to someone about this.

 

8/24/2997: I guess I'm warming up to the troopers again. Some seem to really enjoy me around. I also found a good friend, who now I see as family. Doom. Such an odd soldier but he was close to Poppy. For that, I will make sure to keep him safe. A promise to him and to her. - Which brings me to another point, I'm recovering still. How long has it been..? God the days just fly past you when you're here..so why does it hurt so much? I think it's simple really. I lost someone I hardly got to see as my new life had changed. It ended too quickly. I am currently just distracting myself from the ever pressing emotions of the past. Doomed not to repeat them, praying I don't. Knowing now I am a better solider puts my mind slightly at ease. . . . Do I miss the old crew? Yes, I always will. Am I willing to accept the new ones, the new troopers who make up the ship of the Audie Murphy? Yes. I cannot allow myself to be stressed out by trying to keep them all alive, which is what I did before I left for the 88th. I was stupid. I was horribly stupid. Lives come and go, I am not god, I cannot save them all and I know that now. It's taken me over seven years to learn this, sadly. I just kept hoping that I'd be able to save them all. Sad isn't it? - Though I think some are wondering why I mask my emotions most of the time, I have a feeling soon I'm going to sit down with a group of them and start spilling out all the stories I have with the old unit. It's just a feeling, they can change in a heart beat. Which isn't bad. Alright. Alright I'm going to end this log, I am just rambling at this time.

 

7/13/2998: Hell, it's about tim

 

7/21/2998: I guess I'm writing again, it's been a long time but it's a good thing. This is where I can place my thoughts but...I have an issue that I cant seem to work out. It's being social. I don't understand how anyone can be so social. Maybe it's just myself who has changed so much coming from the 88th and back to the 112th, It's differnt to say the least. I know almost no one which in itself isn't a bad thing, but it's also not a good thing. Good men and women die, it's a fact of life. And so I've seen all of their names on that little plate, wondering. How the hell did I make it out alive for so long. I guess I'll never know. I do wish a few of the old mates were still here but it's a new age. New troopers to teach. New lessons to learn. I always have to ask myself. Am I doing the right thing? Am I doing the best I can for these men and women? Truly. I cannot answer that myself. Time. Time will tell if I am doing the right thing. . 

 

 

 

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5 hours ago, Archer said:

i guess you should remove maldin from the dead list

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

8 month PK reversal, motherfucker

they left, so does it really matter?

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add swift

the guy who made holtz cry in their first meeting

the guy who made holtz go back to drinking

add swift

the best guy

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the omission from speech or writing of a word or words that are superfluous or able to be understood from contextual clues.

if u has anymore questions, feel free to ask

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On 8/16/2017 at 7:06 PM, MrGoodMeme said:

the omission from speech or writing of a word or words that are superfluous or able to be understood from contextual clues.

if u has anymore questions, feel free to ask

I think it's more my style of writing where I add words and shit. - Where I have the Grave Yard more as a voice recording but typed down. 

 

Like the talk to text bull shit.

That's just me. 

 

So it's not for everyone. 

 

I can fix it up if it truly bothers you that much.

9 hours ago, Bohannon said:

Add A. Thacker?

I'll be adding her soon. - In fact right now. 

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4 hours ago, radical roach said:

update it with holtz's dishonourable discharge

 

4 hours ago, Archer said:

a washout tho

 

6 hours ago, F r a n c o said:

but he isnt transfered, or retired, or dead

 

Thank you for the comments, that are Oh-so-needed on this profile. 

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